A Lesson in Getting Married

I am officially a Mrs.! My wedding day was as special and as beautiful as I could have ever hoped, but it did not happen without hard work. Through the many months of planning, all the way up to “I Do”, I learned the ins and outs and dos and don’ts of planning a wedding. I had a great wedding planner to help me through the process but looking back I feel like there were so many things I wish I knew while planning. Which is why I wanted to give you my takeaways from getting married, what I learned, so that it might help some of you!

1. Confirm, and then confirm again. While planning your wedding it is important to be incredibly specific and ask every question you can think of. With each part of your wedding- location, photography, lighting, flowers, food, hair, dress, suits, etc. be very clear when communicating what you want and make sure you get confirmation on every detail. You may think you’re communicating one thing or assume that something is taken care of and you do not want to find out last-minute that what you’d hoped for is not actually happening. It is better to over-explain and ask too many questions than be stressed on your special day.
2. Set up point-of-contacts for the wedding day. Even if you are not having a wedding party, make sure you have designated people to be a point-of-contact for you on your wedding day. They can be the buffer for the bride and groom so that they aren’t getting hassled or bombarded with questions on their big day.
3. Wedding Planner + 1. Similar to the previous point, there needs to be a point-of-contact other than the wedding planner, bride or groom, that knows all the wedding details and can answer every wedding question. If the wedding planner is busy, there should be someone else people can direct their questions to other than the bride and groom the day of the wedding. The bride and groom should be able to have fun and relax and not be worried with every detail and question. I would recommend just sitting down a month before the wedding with whomever you choose and go through all the wedding details and schedule.
4. Have designated people to steam and iron. The bride and groom want to look their best on their big day, this means that the suits, dress, veil, etc. need to be wrinkle free. It’s very easy to get overwhelmed with everything going on and the last thing the couple should be stressed with is ironing. Designate a couple of people ahead of time to handle the steaming, ironing, and clothing details.
5. Have a designated room for the groom to get ready. While I knew I would need a separate room to get ready for the big day, Bryan and I didn’t consider that the groom would also need a designated space. This created a bit of stress for us on the day of our wedding that could have been avoided.
6. Have snacks on deck. While the bride and groom are getting ready there are usually a group of family and friends around them. Because this process can take a couple of hours, I would make sure to have snacks and drinks set up in the room so that people don’t get too restless and begin to stress out the bride and groom.
7. Have a back-up plan for your back-up plan. Be over-prepared, you never know what is going to happen the day-of! Before we even arrived for our wedding Bryan and I were already resorting to our Plan B. We had to come up with an alternate route to get to the lighthouse for our wedding. On the day-of, our Plan B route to the lighthouse was suddenly blocked by the Cancun Marathon. Because we had not come up with a Plan C, we had to pull some not so safe, and less than legal driving maneuvers to get there. Have a Plan A, B, and C!
8. Turn off your phone. On the day of your wedding and maybe even your entire wedding weekend, turn off your cell phone! This will prevent people from calling and texting you with any questions on your special day. Your wedding day or wedding weekend should be about the bride and the groom, you shouldn’t be stressed with everyone’s questions or work emails.
9. Have the wedding planner arrive before you. If you are having a destination wedding, have the wedding planner arrive a day to a day and a half before you get there. That way they can workout any unresolved details before everyone arrives. Even if you’re not having a destination wedding, having your wedding planner there to problem solve far before anyone arrives is extremely helpful.
10. Do not worry yourself with people’s room bookings or travel plans. You should not be getting questions about hotel rooms or travel the weekend of your wedding. This is another reason I suggest turning your phone off. If people can’t seem to get themselves from the airport to the hotel without texting the bride and groom, then maybe they shouldn’t be attending your wedding.

Planning a wedding is stressful and a ton of work, like any big event, but it really is incredibly rewarding when you finally get to the big day. To any of you stuck in the thick of it now, it is definitely worth it and I hope the few things I’ve learned can help you out!

xo,