Date with Purpose

Dating-That moment when you realize you need to delete a phone number once and for all.

It may beย 3:51 am, listening to that slow love song, drunk texting the one that got away who’s overseas. Or after the girls night when you return to your empty bed.. Iooking through your phone book for someone to call. It’s just never a good idea. You end up buying that overpriced plane ticket. Or going through old photos and digging an even bigger whole in your heart.ย 

There’s always regrets to be had. Even when you have the best intentions. When everything is said and done you look back and think of a hundred things you would have done differently. This particular night I’m juggling an old love interest and a new potential beau while feeling some type of way. Why is it that the difficult route is always the preferred one? I think about the relationships I’ve had in the past. I called them a waste of time hours ago. This red wine has given me a new perspective.

My age is the age for settling down. Each day I go through my news feed and see engagements, marriages, and pregnancy announcments. But what if you haven’t found the one? What do you do if you are single; or in that terrible relationship that needs to end but you’re clinging on for dear life due to status quo? I’d rather be the crazy, life-loving friend that isn’t tied down. The one that your boyfriend/fiance/husband is concerned when you go out with on girl’s night. The free spirit. Who needs a relationship where you’re unhappy in the one you’re in anyway right?

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I see now that all these past experiences of mine are lessons. They always say you don’t know the good until you’ve experienced the mediocre. I’m the one you learn from. My past is the example of what NOT to do. Each one of my girlfriends come to me to ask my advice. I always speak the raw truth.ย I use the advice of a man to counsel them.

This man said, “until there is a ring on your finger, you are single.” I reinforce with…ย until he claims you as his wife, he isn’t serious. It really is true that a man knows when he knows. I have seen menย that leave their girlfriends emotional and ringless after 6 year relationships,ย then propose to the very next girl. I have also seen men that propose in little than under a year resort to quick divorces. Nothing is guaranteed.ย 


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I do however believe that we as women know when something is not right. Our women’s intuition is real and never lies. Trust it. If you hesitate to hit send on that message… don’t send it. If you want to break up with him, but feel as if you can change him… leave. Most importantly if you are unhappy… go find your happiness. Life is too short and we must date with purpose.

Jo Olivierย 

If you want to check out more on Jo, the author of this piece:ย 

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1 Comment

  • Reply
    Williamsync
    May 11, 2016 at 2:47 pm

    Really informative forum topic.Really thank you! Marilyn

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